This guy just can’t make a deal with anyone until he extracts a little blood. I’d hate to be the guy at his local Domino’s when he haggles over the expired coupons.
Deano pusses out to begin with and brings his buddy Sutter in. But he can’t just do it. He’s got to haggle the Flames for a week first! The only hold up now is the fact that Sutter is under contract with the Flames. No problem, right? Pay his contract. Oh wait, Sutter was Calgary’s GM! He probably makes MORE than Deano! Dean ain’t paying that, no way! So I can just imagine the phone call, Dean to the Flames GM Jay Feaster:
DEANO:“There are negotiations being made that are going to answer all of your questions and solve all of your problems. That’s all I can tell you right now. Darryl, he grew up working for my family in San Jose. When we made our move to LA I told him ‘Darryl, you are going to be my right hand man. Terry Murray is no longer Consigliari … err I mean Coach.’ He’s going to be sleeping with fishes, capich?’ That’s no reflection on Terry it’s just the way I want it. Besides, if I ever need help who’s a better Consigliari than Darryl. That’s it.
FEASTER: Well, look Dean, we need you to take over his whole contract, no negotiations, pay the whole thing or we don’t let him out of it.
DEANO: Well, when Darryl was first starting out, he was signed to a personal services contract with this team I won’t mention names. And as his career got better and better, he wanted to get out of it. But the Team wouldn’t let him. Now, Darryl is my father’s godson. So my father went to see this team and offered them $10,000 to let Johnny go, but the team said no. So the next day, my father went back, only this time with Luca Brasi. Within an hour, he had a signed release for a certified check of $1000.
FEASTER: How did he do that?
DEANO: My father made him an offer he couldn’t refuse.
FEASTER: What was that?
DEANO: Luca Brasi held a gun to his head, and my father assured him that either his brains or his signature would be on the contract.
DEANO:That’s a true story.
FEASTER: OK, OK whatever man, we’ll continue to pay 10% of his salary, you pick up the rest.
DEANO: I come from a personal friend of Mr Johnny Fontane. That friend promises his undying friendship if you would do him a small favour.
FEASTER: Holy shit, Dean this isn’t a movie.
DEANO: That’s it, now you pay me 1,000.00 in a certified check or you never eat in this town again.