Archive for January, 2012


Author: kingster

Team officials already starting in on what an ahole he is:

On a day when I should be gleefully chirping 49’er fans, I instead have to put up with this dumbass?

In case you didn’t hear, the Stanley Cup Champion Boston Bruins were honored today by the entire country in a ritual performed for all the major sports every year – the elected representative of the people of this country invites them to the Capitol of our Nation for a White House meet and greet. That’s all it is. It isn’t a referendum on the President, or the CIA or the way the economy is shaping up. It’s the Nation, his team and his teammates joining together to be honored by the guy who was elected to run the country. Thomas, claiming to be a “Free Citizen” (capitalization, his not mine) chose not to attend, citing as his reason “government has gown out of control”.

Now first of all, lets not mince words. It’s a racist move. This is a right wing tea party lover of Glenn Beck who is infuriated that a black man is president.

Second of all, he’s lying. This is exactly about “party” and “politics”. He did not want to appear a supporter of Obama or the Democratic candidate for office in the upcoming election.

Third of all it’s childish. He talks of the great ambition of the founding fathers and adherence to the Constitution, and he clearly knows not fuck one about either of those two things. The founding fathers fought vehemently to frame a Constitution that gives Thomas the right to be a petulant child. And it gives Ron Paul the right to debate Rick Perry and angrily accuse each other of whatever they want … then shake hands afterward. The Constitution allows for a Legislative Branch to overcome political dispute and sit down to resolve the problems that face us. Obama is running the country alongside a congress and judiciary pu t there by the framers of the Constitution.

Tim Thomas is the unabomber with great flexibility. He can do the splits, is pretty agile and has a great glove hand. Take those things away and this guy is living in the woods in Minnesota writing his manifesto.

I don’t care if you are liberal, conservative, Tea Party or Occupy – show up. You and your teammates worked together for this day. The city of Boston, as full of assholes as it might be, gets another team at the White House. If you CARE about this country you just dissed, show up, sulk a little and go home.

People with a brain are fucking this guy up on Twitter right now:

I would tweet something about Tim Thomas, but I believe Twitter has grown too big

Having read Tim Thomas’ statement, it occurs he really has all that equipment because he’s a survivalist…

Obama could have avoided this, and gotten Thomas to come, if he had made it “The Bruins’ White House Visit – Presented By Discover Card.

Bottom line is its just dumb. To hate a man that much because of politics? To not be willing to shake his hand? Stupid. Pointless.

Certain that Tim Thomas has team mates that don’t share his political or ideological beliefs. Will he not show up for games because of that?

So, if the government is so out of whack that he has to denounce and disrespect the President, will he then please completely withdraw from the country? Don’t use the roads. Fly to and from your games on planes not regulated by the FAA. If it’s a protest NOT of Democrats and NOT of a Black President, but rather a protest of how our Government is too big, then stop using government services, asshole. You can stay, no problem. But if you want your political opinion respected, you have to act like a big boy. If you are in the minority and you lose, you still belong to the Country and you still do what the Founding Fathers told you to do – don’t be a hypocrite and go around sabotaging things, work for change.


I had one Right Wing Whacko tell me that I was violating his right to free speech under the Constitution by attacking his no-show? REALLY? If I did that it would mean I somehow got Congress to “enact a law abridging the freedom of speech” and I’m pretty sure calling Tim Thomas what he is – a dumbass- does not do that. He’s got his right to free speech, he just fucking posted it on Facebook! He spoke. He looked stupid. Tea Partiers are celebrating. That’s America. Whoop it up, numbskulls.

The TRUE Abomination

Author: kingster

Twenty-some years later the friendless take over. The dumpy, undereducated, overmedicated losers have their day in the sun. I feel like Stan Gable from Revenge of the Nerds, looking on as the community of total misfits eats one (or three) more plates full of nachos, washes the cheese sauce from the front of their jersey and then heads off to the game for “LGK appreciation night”.


Reminds me too of when they bring the mentally handicapped to the mall.


They should have called it “socially inept appreciation day”. I had a theory a long time ago that the morons at LGK that pay 5 dollars a month for a bbs that runs for free (essentially) then go to “pick up roller hockey games” and “pass the hat” for the guy who runs it (which is to say the guy that does nothing) must be blindingly stupid or so socially awkward that they are basically paying to have friends. Granted, these are internet friends, but ….


Do you remember, like me, a better time? An era where anyone that “met up” with someone they talked to on the internet was a total loser?



Below is a list of the “mods”. Do you remember hall monitors? Do you remember the people that begged to be hall monitors? These are the guys that make sure if someone posts an erroneous birthday, they correct it! If someone puts a thread about Mcdonalds in the movie forum, they promptly move it to the food thread. Thank god for these guys. These idiots finally, 20 years later, got their names on the message board at Staples! Woot, right? Yeah, their SCREEN NAMES! Pass the ranch dressing bro, I got a mouthful of fries here.


I had forgotten this one. The guy that runs this site has always run it for profit. Sold ads, sold out to Sold “memberships”, marked up tee shirts, marked up tickets. Well, while he was making a profit, he was also pandering for donations. I had forgot this Creeping Death gargantuan dude who donated the first server. Matt Dancing Liar Berry gave the Rat the second server. I mean these guys GAVE him money, just to get in good on the LGGay.



I”m going to be nice and not say anything about the next one. I just want you to try and tell me now that the Revenge of the Nerds reference wasn’t spot on. BTW, that’s Kingstoner on the right.

This is not meant to be a comprehensive list. Frankly, there isn’t enough space on the internet to list all of the atrocities that have been committed on the game of hockey by the Los Angeles Kings. But this is a start:




This has to be top of the list, the rest are in no particular order. Mark Hardy, the “whipping boy” of the fans during his atrocious playing career in LA, returned as a King Assistant Coach. Of course, then police allege that he and his college age daughter went out drinking one night. He then tried to molest her in the hotel room that night. Sexual. His daughter. Yep. She called the cops on him and he was arrested for molesting his adult daughter.

What did the Kings do? Accepted his resignation, then RE-HIRED HIM as a coach in their Ontario California ECHL affiliate, the LA Reign. That’s right, a guy whose adult daughter had to call the police on him cause he was sexually molesting her. Welcome back, creep.


The party girl allegedly drunk drives home from the LUC ROBITAILLE Kings sponsored Hall of Fame Induction party, an event that had to feature Kings brass. Police arrest her for allegedly drunk driving 35 miles per hour on an empty freeway. She misses a couple games then is right back at it.


Of course, like any other King that wants to win a Cup, he had to leave to do it. But then, while serving as Kings “President of Business Operations” he involves himself with alleged bad boys and then has his house foreclosed on .. the same time he’s auctioning off stuff like his 500th NHL goal puck? Luc earned more than 50 million dollars in his playing career.

Kingfans and the organization run to his defense claiming it’s a “strategic foreclosure”. That’s some great excuse, all it means is he’s ripping off the bank ON PURPOSE.



While playing in the NHL for the Los Angeles Kings in 2002, the charming Joe Corvo grabbed a womans ass and then punched her in the face. He was convicted of assault and the Kings suspended him 3 games. Very stern. He went on to play another 200 or so games for the Kings, who allegedly don’t care if their players beat up women in bars.


The biggest creep of all. Allegedly leverage-bought the Kings, took all the money. Gave Gretzky a Bentley for his birthday in a big on-ice show in the same year he held playoff ticket refunds (LOL, like they were gonna make the playoffs that year) until next years season seat deposits were due. Drove the Kings to eventual bankruptcy. I guess that’s better than a strategic foreclosure, but I’m not sure.

Here’s the collateral he used to buy the team:

I think he agreed to throw in some wooden nickels too.



Cloutier had surgery performed, all arranged by the club. They sent him to one of the mountain communities just outside of Denver. They set him up in a Super 8 Motel. No fooling. They “explained” this by claiming nothing else was available. So a team owned by one of the richest men in the world, headquarted in Denver, couldn’t get this guy in someone’s ski home? Or the Marriott? Abysmal!

My fingers are starting to cramp. Don’t even get me started on sign and trade rapings of players. Don’t get me started on Lombardi going all crazy one day and then apologizing to the entire NHL under commissioners orders the next. Don’t get me talking about trading players the day before their NTC kicks in on a contract they JUST signed. Playing fast and loose is the way they do it in LA. It’s why they lose every year. Forget how they silence outside journalists by literally bribing them with offers of employment. Sick. Now, literally, there is no blood left in my fingers I can not possibly list any further atrocities without severing my carpal tunnel nerves and whatnot.


I just can’t control myself though.

Last year I threw another tantrum (inspired by the movie “Scarface” and inspired a little by my favorite Godfather movie, Godfather XVI with Tony Danza and The Situation ). My Italian blood got the better of me and I yelled and screamed in the middle of another “this is the year … oops” hapless season. This was over a single goal call not overturned by the War Room in Toronto. Now listen. I love “war rooms”. I have my own war room. I hunker down and plot to fuck people over in it. I have learned all this from the classic movies, again I mention Scarface and also would like to add Goodfellas, Carlito’s Way and The Sopranos. But I digress. Mike Murphy, an obvious Mick, wouldn’t overturn the call so we lost the game and, well, as Danny Devito might do, I lost it. I called Murphy out and said he’d never ever overturn a call cause he hates the Kings because they didn’t hire him as a GM. Petty? Hateful? A true look into my childish personality? Yes, yes and yes.

So I did what any goodfella would do. I apologized like a big baby! I said that I agreed with my 50k fine. I agreed that I was …

“wrong, inappropriate and my comments were without merit”

Mike Murphy basically called me a dick and a baby, Gary Bettman did the same thing and I went public – “I AGREE”!

Now sometimes I draw the line. When I infuriated Jack Johnson and the University of Michigan Hockey program and their legendary coach, coming right out and saying that the kid knew nothing about elementary hockey until *I* got hold of him and taught him, well I didn’t apologize. I didn’t have to! Fuck him he’s not the boss of me! What I did instead, very sneaky here, I fuckin copped out! I said “listen I told some internet fag blogger and I thought he understood this was not for the record, but apparently he’s not a suck up like Helene Elliot or Rich ‘he works for me now’ Hammond and this twerp published it.” So, no harm no foul!

More recently however I blew it, lost my spaghetti brain and I need to apologize yet again. See I traded with Edmonton and they sent me two stiffs. Both of them hurt. You don’t do that to the Don. No way. You play fair or you’ll be face down in the Hudson, capiche? I fucked em up good! Told ’em that I’d rather deal with Bernie Madoff! THAT JUST HAPPENED EDMONTON. Oh snap.

Anyway I have to apologize again. Sorry.

“I should have never said what I said publicly. It was the wrong thing to do. I apologize to

Edmonton,as well as the National Hockey League, that that wasn’t the way to handle it.”

In closing, I’d like to say that I never fucked anyone over in my life didn’t have it coming to them. You got that? All I have in this world is my balls and my word and I don’t break them for no one. Do you understand? That piece of shit up there I never liked him, I never trusted him. For all I know he had me set up and he had my friend Angel Fernandez killed. But that’s history. I’m here, he’s not. Do you wanna go on with me, you say it. You don’t, then you make a move.

You think this is funny? How am I funny, like a Clown funny? What is so funny about me? What the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me. Tell me what’s funny.

Every year. 47 in a row, excluding work stoppages! Something fucks the Kings up! This year in their annual “the future is now” drive, it appears that Anze Frankenstein Kopitar will once again be the fuck-up! Brendan Morrow nailed him. While I would never root for an injury, once one happens my moral code says HA HA HA HA HA. Career Ending? One can only hope!!

Get well slowly, Anze!!


Author: kingster


Why would you admit this?

Author: kingster

Dustin Penner throws out his back eating pancakes. If you didn’t see it already, I’M SERIOUS. He threw out his back eating pancakes, says it just locked up on him.


I mean he stole the fucking joke. How can you write something insulting or funny when he actually throws out his back eating pancakes. The gigantic, lazy, overweight and underachieving albatross throws out his back eating pancakes.


Go Kings Go?



Author: kingster

And before you call DFG, yes, there are 17 quail in that picture. Two hunters. Suck it birds!